Seamus Levine
Seamus Levine (pronounced "Shay-mus Lavigne") is a pirate veteran and current fisherman. He has giant pegs for both arms and legs and an eyepatch. Every time he tells the tall tale of how he sustained these injuries, the story is different every time, leaving it to be pretty much an unsolved mystery. He usually hangs out at the dock, where he lives, or the Drunken Clam, where he emerges from the shadows and drops in on a conversation with the guys, to share his piratey wisdom. Biography He first appeared in "A Fish Out of Water", working at the piratey docks. He introduced Peter to the fisherman life. He also had major roles in other episodes like this, such as "The Fat Man and the Sea", "Peter the Cheater", and "The Perfect Castaway". In "Long John Peter", Seamus wanted to get back in the saddle and feel like a pirate once again, so he joined Peter on his piratey adventure and had a blast. It was also revealed in this episode that his penis was also a missing limb, replaced with a peg. In "Follow the Money", Seamus started a relationship with Meg. They went on their first date at a fancy restaurant. Their relationship ended in "Pirate Booby", when the duo broke up. The Disability Story It's a running gag in the show for Seamus to tell a different story every time he reminisces about how he lost his limbs, making the true story ambiguous. *A Fish Out of Water **Seamus first said that he lost his limbs in a fight with a sea serpent back in his pirating days. **Seamus later said that he was tortured by skeleton pirates that cut off his limbs. **Seamus said that a shark attacked him. **When Peter questioned the inconsistency in his stories, he sarcastically remarked that it's perfectly natural and his father was a tree. *The Fat Man and the Sea **Seamus again stated that he was born with wooden limbs, as he was a human/tree hybrid, just like he mentioned in the last episode. **Seamus warned Peter not to catch Bessy the Big Fish, saying that he tried catch Bessy in the past and she ripped off his arms and legs. Peter reminds Seamus that the last time he told the story, he said his father was a tree. Seamus said that he was lying. It was actually his mother who was a tree. *Peter the Cheater **Seamus once again states that he lost his limbs to a sea monster. **Seamus changed the story and said that he was stranded on an island without food once and had to eat his own limbs to keep himself from starving to death. **Seamus said that he lost his arms and legs, when he cheated on his ex-wife and she got angry at him and attacked him. When Peter asks if this is true, he admits that he's never been married. He just lost his limbs, while sword fighting some female pirates. **Seamus retells the story of how he lost his limbs. He says he was dropping wooden pegs into a wood chipper and accidentally fell in, himself, losing his arms and legs. He was able to take four wooden pegs that he had not yet put into the wood chipper and attached them to himself. **Seamus tells Chris, Meg, and Stewie that he lost his arms and legs by running with scissors and adds "Listen to your mother, kids." *Mo' Jobs **When Peter says he lost his job in a shipwreck, Seamus says he lost his limbs in a shipwreck. Seamus later states that it was actually a car accident. Then he says it was a bike accident. Then he finally says that it was a bathroom accident, which only confused Peter. **Peter thinks he should get a job to make more money and Seamus encourages this, saying that he wished he had more money, when getting "Six Million Dollar Man" surgery. He says that he wanted to get robotic cyborg limbs but he only had enough money for wooden limbs. **Seamus states once again that he lost his limbs in a shark attack, then changes it to whale attack, then dolphin attack, then fish attack, then from sistema snack attack container. *Long John Peter **Seamus said his arms and legs were crippled in a shipwreck, and he had to use only his mouth and penis to construct wooden limbs, using the trees and broken bits of boat on the island he was stranded on. **He later said that British pirates cut off his limbs in a sword fight, including his penis. He then pulled down his pants, revealing a giant peg, bigger than the others, attached to his crotch and swore that his dick was really that big. *And Then There Were Fewer **Seamus said that he was a wooden doll, crafted by James Woods. James Woods wished him to life, Pinocchio style, and he didn't wish hard enough, depriving his arms and legs of the magic. **He later admitted it was made up and that he and Woods just got baked once and he ate his limbs. *Send in Stewie, Please **Stewie imitates Seamus and while pretending to be him, claims that his father was a human and his mother was a tree. Episode Appearances *A Fish Out of Water *The Fat Man and the Sea *Peter the Cheater *Model Misbehavior *The Perfect Castaway *Mo' Jobs *Deep Throats *Sibling Rivalry *Stewie Loves Lois *Boys Do Cry *Bill & Peter's Bogus Journey *Long John Peter *The Juice is Loose *Ocean's Three and a Half *Movin' Out (Brian's Song) *Believe it or Not, Joe's Walking on Air *FOX-y Lady *420 *Peter's Progress *Big Man on Hippocampus *And Then There Were Fewer *Trading Places *New Kidney in Town *Baby, You Knock Me Out *The Mortician *Be Careful What You Fish For *The Blind Side *Deaf Penalty *Three Kings (as Captain Bryon Hadley) *Save the Clam *Peter Gets Served Category:Characters Category:Major Characters Category:Recurring Characters Category:Male Category:Residents of Quahog Category:Neutral Good Category:Pirates Category:Cripples Category:Veterans Category:Characters Voiced by Seth MacFarlane Category:Silent Generation Category:Naval Soldiers Category:Fishermen Category:Levine Family